My name is John Doe, Esq. I am a personal injury attorney. I am a good attorney. Damn good, if I do say so myself.
Today was a day of loss for me, so I felt the need to write about it. Not a loss of a case, or a trial, but a personal, deep loss.
I don't want to get into the details of my loss, because I do pride my anonymity, and my privacy. But I have vowed to use my blog to help myself and help others.
Lawyers are human. I know it is hard to believe, because lawyers are always supposed to be there for other people. I am often the shoulder to cry on. But today, I needed a shoulder of my own.
Today was one of those days. My heart was ripped out. It was stomped on. Destroyed. The pain is so real, so intense. Unfortunately, this type of pain I have had to suffer before. In fact, before, the pain was much worse.
I have learned from my past experience. It has made me stronger. But I am allowed to suffer too.
I guess my point in writing this is to vent. This is to show a personal side of myself. To free myself of the burden of the pain. It won't free me completely. But, it is a start.
I am not speaking of lost love or lost time, but of lost potential. The potential for something important was lost today. When it comes down to it, potential is pretty much all we ever have.
We are all potentially something. We all have the potential to be good or evil, happy or sad, yin or yang. You don't know what your true potential is until that potential is gone.
But, I lost some potential today. The potential for greatness. Hoever, there is a good part about lost potential. It can be found again. But when it is lost, it is sometimes hard to find. I will find it again one day. But for now, I grieve this loss. I am allowed. I am a lawyer. I am human.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Sunday, September 28, 2008
THE DAY OF REST (REALLY?!?)
For some of you, the weekend may be a time of rest and relaxation. A time to reorganize your thoughts and priorities, and to recharge your batteries. Maybe that is what I would do, if I only had a regular job.
Most of you in the practice of law understand that our field is a 24/7 operation.
Some attorneys in larger firms are forced to put in their 2500 hour minimum per year. Many work 70-80 hours per week (in a slow week). However, even for them, usually when they go home, their work is done.
I find that generally, attorneys will stay in the office to get the work done, and then they leave to be free from the shackles.
When you work in HELL, this is especially true. In fact, it is even more true, to an extent. We are only permitted to work between the hours of 9AM and 6:30PM. No exceptions. You are expected to fit 40 hours of work in in those times. This includes your lunch break. So really, there is no time to waste.
You might say that this is good. You know when you are expected to be in. You can't ever leave late. The problem is that client issues and your own work in the office are very difficult to finish in such a short time. I know it seems strange to be bitching about short work week hours, but it is the case.
Now, however, is where I will really start to bitch.
As a private practitioner (IN MY NON-HELL TIME), I have to do everything that I would normally do for HELL in the 40 hours, in my spare time. I have to do all my client intakes, file work, legal analyses, planning, drafting, motions, settlement letters, ordering specials, phone calls, and client interactions (to name just a few things), on my weeknights, and weekends. I do not do any work for my own practice while at HELL. I have a personal ethical code that will not allow me to do that (no matter how much I intend to make them suffer).
I knew that it would e tough going in to this. I expected all of this. But, it is damn harder then I ever thought.
So, today is Sunday. I am sitting on my laptop writing this blog. At the same time I am perusing multiple e-mails from clients. I am opening two new files (physically) for client intakes that I did at my own personal office on Tuesday night until about 9:30 pm. The only up-side is that clients love the evening hours and personal attention. Great for them. More of the same for me.
I am trying to find ways to cope. I don't drink alcohol. I don't do drugs. I find myself doing a lot more around the house (cooking, cleaning), just to get a break. My wife loves it, but I don't want her getting used to that idea either. Not that she doesn't do much more than me around the house than I do. But, please, I just don't have time to do much more than I already do.
I am feeling overwhelmed. I feel that no one else out there gets what it is like to open their own practice under these conditions. If any of you have any guidance, please comment or e-mail. I just am looking for some suggestions.
Otherwise, I may go postal.
Most of you in the practice of law understand that our field is a 24/7 operation.
Some attorneys in larger firms are forced to put in their 2500 hour minimum per year. Many work 70-80 hours per week (in a slow week). However, even for them, usually when they go home, their work is done.
I find that generally, attorneys will stay in the office to get the work done, and then they leave to be free from the shackles.
When you work in HELL, this is especially true. In fact, it is even more true, to an extent. We are only permitted to work between the hours of 9AM and 6:30PM. No exceptions. You are expected to fit 40 hours of work in in those times. This includes your lunch break. So really, there is no time to waste.
You might say that this is good. You know when you are expected to be in. You can't ever leave late. The problem is that client issues and your own work in the office are very difficult to finish in such a short time. I know it seems strange to be bitching about short work week hours, but it is the case.
Now, however, is where I will really start to bitch.
As a private practitioner (IN MY NON-HELL TIME), I have to do everything that I would normally do for HELL in the 40 hours, in my spare time. I have to do all my client intakes, file work, legal analyses, planning, drafting, motions, settlement letters, ordering specials, phone calls, and client interactions (to name just a few things), on my weeknights, and weekends. I do not do any work for my own practice while at HELL. I have a personal ethical code that will not allow me to do that (no matter how much I intend to make them suffer).
I knew that it would e tough going in to this. I expected all of this. But, it is damn harder then I ever thought.
So, today is Sunday. I am sitting on my laptop writing this blog. At the same time I am perusing multiple e-mails from clients. I am opening two new files (physically) for client intakes that I did at my own personal office on Tuesday night until about 9:30 pm. The only up-side is that clients love the evening hours and personal attention. Great for them. More of the same for me.
I am trying to find ways to cope. I don't drink alcohol. I don't do drugs. I find myself doing a lot more around the house (cooking, cleaning), just to get a break. My wife loves it, but I don't want her getting used to that idea either. Not that she doesn't do much more than me around the house than I do. But, please, I just don't have time to do much more than I already do.
I am feeling overwhelmed. I feel that no one else out there gets what it is like to open their own practice under these conditions. If any of you have any guidance, please comment or e-mail. I just am looking for some suggestions.
Otherwise, I may go postal.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
HOW DO YOU HIDE YOUR OWN PRACTICE FROM THE SNEAKY EYES IN HELL?
I guess it is not a question that gets asked a lot. But, it is a question (or a similar question anyway) that I have been asking more and more frequently recently.
I hate HELL. As we all know from my past posts, HELL is not a place for the weak-at-heart. But, with all the pain and agony, I find myself moving more and more towards my own practice.
I have been slowly working toward getting more and more clients on my own. I use nothing from HELL, I truly do it on my own. I am not going to get into too many details that might give me away, but I am definitely at the "tipping point". I can only take on so many more clients, before I just run out of time to handle them all. Now, this should be a good thing. But, I can't afford to give up my job at HELL. Not that the pay is that great, but, when you're on your on, your all alone. There is no weekly paycheck guarantee.
I am sure it is a problem many of my readers have had. Whether it is in the field of law, or any other profession or honorable job. I know that my sweetest revenge will ultimately be to leave them. (This is not to say that I am not still looking for ways to destroy them in the interim - 'cause I am.) But the question that is begged is... How do I know when I am truly ready to leave? Is there an exact money figure? Is it 6 months worth of salary? Or is it some event? I just can't stand being there another second.
I am searching for answers. In the meanwhile, I have to keep everything in perspective. To do that, I must keep my plans away from the wretched, sneaky eyes of THE WEASEL, and THE FAMILY. What to do? What to do? Advice anyone?
I hate HELL. As we all know from my past posts, HELL is not a place for the weak-at-heart. But, with all the pain and agony, I find myself moving more and more towards my own practice.
I have been slowly working toward getting more and more clients on my own. I use nothing from HELL, I truly do it on my own. I am not going to get into too many details that might give me away, but I am definitely at the "tipping point". I can only take on so many more clients, before I just run out of time to handle them all. Now, this should be a good thing. But, I can't afford to give up my job at HELL. Not that the pay is that great, but, when you're on your on, your all alone. There is no weekly paycheck guarantee.
I am sure it is a problem many of my readers have had. Whether it is in the field of law, or any other profession or honorable job. I know that my sweetest revenge will ultimately be to leave them. (This is not to say that I am not still looking for ways to destroy them in the interim - 'cause I am.) But the question that is begged is... How do I know when I am truly ready to leave? Is there an exact money figure? Is it 6 months worth of salary? Or is it some event? I just can't stand being there another second.
I am searching for answers. In the meanwhile, I have to keep everything in perspective. To do that, I must keep my plans away from the wretched, sneaky eyes of THE WEASEL, and THE FAMILY. What to do? What to do? Advice anyone?
Monday, September 15, 2008
I GUESS I'LL MISS TOMORROW TOO
The good part about getting docked is that I don't really care any longer about when I miss.
I have some important dates and events coming up that I was going to have to miss, because I am short on time. But, if the only thing they do is dock me pay, I might just take advantage of it.
I'm still waiting on ideas. I'll be out of the office tomorrow, so maybe I can think up some more of my own.
I have some important dates and events coming up that I was going to have to miss, because I am short on time. But, if the only thing they do is dock me pay, I might just take advantage of it.
I'm still waiting on ideas. I'll be out of the office tomorrow, so maybe I can think up some more of my own.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
DOCKED A DAY'S PAY - REVENGE
Many people believe that being an attorney is glamourous. I guess at times that may be true, but mostly it is just like any other job.
To prove my point, please note the following scenario.
I have had to use all of my sick days this year. Vacation time too. There has been a medical issue going on in my personal life. Nothing major, but something that is a little time consuming and unfortunately I have had to miss some time.
However, I am an attorney, and have been practicing for many years. I was under the assumption that if I had to miss more than my alloted time, I could either make it up by staying on other days, or simply that THE FAMILY would eat the time. After all, I do bring in more than my fair share of clients and I will always stay when needed.
I never realized how wrong I could be.
Today, I found out that since I am at my max, they are going to pro-rate my salary and dock me on a per day basis. Isn't that just great. I am not even a "day" worker and I am getting docked. Can you freakin' believe it?
I know this is not how it is in most other firms. In fact, I know most jobs don't do that, especially when it is for medical reasons. Worst of all, I can't believe that I let my expectations grow to the point that I would actually believe that THE FAMILY would do the right thing.
My first instance was to screw them. Show them the "who cares?" attitude. I would work from 9-5 and not a second more. I would never be early. Always take a lunch. Never leave late.
Unfortunately, I know that this really isn't too realistic. But, I just can't let them get away with it. I've been taken advantage of, and then when it is time for me to take a little back, I'm bitch-slapped. I just don't know what to do.
I think that I am going to formulate a plan. Since I am off for tomorrow (that pesky day off), I will have some time to let my thoughts wander. I have always wanted to do something big. Make it something that hits them hard and fast, and really hurts them. Especially DON BOY, the prick. But I also don't want them to know it's me. I want them to feel it, but slowly, like little amounts of arsenic put into your drink over time. You probably won't notice each one, but the cumulative effect might kill you.
Okay, so, I still like the idea of "screwing them", but I think it needs to be more subtle. Since my first thought was to bring in an uzi, maybe I should do the opposite - kill them with kindness. No, I just can't. The thought of being "fake" kind to them any longer is making my stomach flip over.
What about the idea of turning DON BOY and FAT GODZILLA against each other. If I do that, surely THE FAMILY will get caught up in the middle. Let's think about this for a second, and how this could play out.
If I go to DON BOY and tell him something that FAT GODZILLA is doing or saying, then he will immediately attack her. Today he attacked THE DOMINATRIX after he saw her talking to me. I told him a made-up story to throw him off our trail, and instead, he used my made-up story to attack her. What a dick!
So, maybe I need to hurt FAT GODZILLA first. The problem with FAT GODZILLA, is that due to the nature of her relationship with DON BOY and THE FAMILY, she is extremely sensitive to everything. If I told her that she was out of line, she might get mad for a second, and then break down and cry. I can only imagine what other attorney's do to her in negotiations. So, if I do go after her first, my idea has to be clever enough to get her to believe it, but also sly enough not to make her cry - at least at first.
Note: It may seem that FAT GODZILLA is more human than DON BOY, and that may be true, but she is just as much (if not more) to blame for the ridiculousness of HELL. DON BOY does it, but FAT GODZILLA let's it go on. Who is really abusing whom?
Alright, I made the decision to go forward with my strategy of "Divide and Conquer". I have also decided to go after FAT GODZILLA first. My methods must be sly and sinister. I must strike quickly, but quietly. I must hurt her, and put that hurt on DON BOY's head. I must try to convince FAT GODZILLA that DON BOY is going to come after her. It has to be something big. Maybe I can convince her that he is going to try to bring in an attorney to partner-up with DON DAD before DON DAD is gone. This way FAT GODZILLA will think she is being squeezed out.
I know that the one thing that she has been looking for is to get out of HELL. Although she is FAMILY, she is not well-loved (or even liked) by the rest of THE FAMILY. I honestly don't know why. Maybe because of DON BOY's disability - she was the child that was ignored. Whatever the case, this is a weakness of hers, one which I must exploit.
So we know what the weaknesses to be exploited are:
DON BOY - Temper, Narcisism
FAT GODZILLA - Inferiority complex, Sensitivity
I think I could do the same thing with DON BOY, as long as I adjust the scenario slightly. If I tell DON BOY that FAT GODZILLA is looking to squeeze him out, he may/may not believe it. But one thing that DON BOY has is a run-away imagination. If I tell him that FAT GODZILLA has been telling people that she wants to start making changes in the firm - start having all the lawyers handle general work as well as the personal injury, this might get his feathers up. If he feels threatened, he will try to do damage control. Remember, he's not a lawyer, so if he thinks she's really trying to muscle him out, he will panic. He is firmly in control now, but if I make it sound like she keeps telling me I should learn other areas (or for that matter some of the other attorneys), he might get scared that FAT GODZILLA wants him out of the way. That's what I need, I need for him to think that she wants him out of the way. If he believes that, he will need to attack her. Then the walls will start to crumble.
So, I have the basics of my plan. I told you I would start one. Well today is day one. I am taking suggestions and advice. Please feel free to comment because I want this to be as successful as possible.
To prove my point, please note the following scenario.
I have had to use all of my sick days this year. Vacation time too. There has been a medical issue going on in my personal life. Nothing major, but something that is a little time consuming and unfortunately I have had to miss some time.
However, I am an attorney, and have been practicing for many years. I was under the assumption that if I had to miss more than my alloted time, I could either make it up by staying on other days, or simply that THE FAMILY would eat the time. After all, I do bring in more than my fair share of clients and I will always stay when needed.
I never realized how wrong I could be.
Today, I found out that since I am at my max, they are going to pro-rate my salary and dock me on a per day basis. Isn't that just great. I am not even a "day" worker and I am getting docked. Can you freakin' believe it?
I know this is not how it is in most other firms. In fact, I know most jobs don't do that, especially when it is for medical reasons. Worst of all, I can't believe that I let my expectations grow to the point that I would actually believe that THE FAMILY would do the right thing.
My first instance was to screw them. Show them the "who cares?" attitude. I would work from 9-5 and not a second more. I would never be early. Always take a lunch. Never leave late.
Unfortunately, I know that this really isn't too realistic. But, I just can't let them get away with it. I've been taken advantage of, and then when it is time for me to take a little back, I'm bitch-slapped. I just don't know what to do.
I think that I am going to formulate a plan. Since I am off for tomorrow (that pesky day off), I will have some time to let my thoughts wander. I have always wanted to do something big. Make it something that hits them hard and fast, and really hurts them. Especially DON BOY, the prick. But I also don't want them to know it's me. I want them to feel it, but slowly, like little amounts of arsenic put into your drink over time. You probably won't notice each one, but the cumulative effect might kill you.
Okay, so, I still like the idea of "screwing them", but I think it needs to be more subtle. Since my first thought was to bring in an uzi, maybe I should do the opposite - kill them with kindness. No, I just can't. The thought of being "fake" kind to them any longer is making my stomach flip over.
What about the idea of turning DON BOY and FAT GODZILLA against each other. If I do that, surely THE FAMILY will get caught up in the middle. Let's think about this for a second, and how this could play out.
If I go to DON BOY and tell him something that FAT GODZILLA is doing or saying, then he will immediately attack her. Today he attacked THE DOMINATRIX after he saw her talking to me. I told him a made-up story to throw him off our trail, and instead, he used my made-up story to attack her. What a dick!
So, maybe I need to hurt FAT GODZILLA first. The problem with FAT GODZILLA, is that due to the nature of her relationship with DON BOY and THE FAMILY, she is extremely sensitive to everything. If I told her that she was out of line, she might get mad for a second, and then break down and cry. I can only imagine what other attorney's do to her in negotiations. So, if I do go after her first, my idea has to be clever enough to get her to believe it, but also sly enough not to make her cry - at least at first.
Note: It may seem that FAT GODZILLA is more human than DON BOY, and that may be true, but she is just as much (if not more) to blame for the ridiculousness of HELL. DON BOY does it, but FAT GODZILLA let's it go on. Who is really abusing whom?
Alright, I made the decision to go forward with my strategy of "Divide and Conquer". I have also decided to go after FAT GODZILLA first. My methods must be sly and sinister. I must strike quickly, but quietly. I must hurt her, and put that hurt on DON BOY's head. I must try to convince FAT GODZILLA that DON BOY is going to come after her. It has to be something big. Maybe I can convince her that he is going to try to bring in an attorney to partner-up with DON DAD before DON DAD is gone. This way FAT GODZILLA will think she is being squeezed out.
I know that the one thing that she has been looking for is to get out of HELL. Although she is FAMILY, she is not well-loved (or even liked) by the rest of THE FAMILY. I honestly don't know why. Maybe because of DON BOY's disability - she was the child that was ignored. Whatever the case, this is a weakness of hers, one which I must exploit.
So we know what the weaknesses to be exploited are:
DON BOY - Temper, Narcisism
FAT GODZILLA - Inferiority complex, Sensitivity
I think I could do the same thing with DON BOY, as long as I adjust the scenario slightly. If I tell DON BOY that FAT GODZILLA is looking to squeeze him out, he may/may not believe it. But one thing that DON BOY has is a run-away imagination. If I tell him that FAT GODZILLA has been telling people that she wants to start making changes in the firm - start having all the lawyers handle general work as well as the personal injury, this might get his feathers up. If he feels threatened, he will try to do damage control. Remember, he's not a lawyer, so if he thinks she's really trying to muscle him out, he will panic. He is firmly in control now, but if I make it sound like she keeps telling me I should learn other areas (or for that matter some of the other attorneys), he might get scared that FAT GODZILLA wants him out of the way. That's what I need, I need for him to think that she wants him out of the way. If he believes that, he will need to attack her. Then the walls will start to crumble.
So, I have the basics of my plan. I told you I would start one. Well today is day one. I am taking suggestions and advice. Please feel free to comment because I want this to be as successful as possible.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
DREAD
I dread going back to HELL tomorrow. It is about 7:00 on Sunday night. My stomach begins to churn at the simple thought of going back there in the morning. Sometimes I wonder if I am the only one out there that feels this way. I am sure I am not, but I just feel like there is no end in sight.
Many of you know that I am in the process of opening my own practice. For those of you that are solo practitioners, I am sure you know what I am going through. I feel like I am at the absolute tipping point. I have been working my tail off, especially on nights and weekends. I get new clients where I can, and I do my own work after a full day in HELL. No, THE FAMILY does not know what I am doing. Although, a few of my closest friend in HELL do know. I am keeping it quiet for obvious reasons.
Basically, I need to keep the job while my other cases are pending. I am looking to leave just as soon as possible, but I need the steady income until my own cases pay off. That being said, I cannot stand being there on a daily basis (HELL). It is much more fulfilling to work my own cases, for my own clients, my own way. I also have to manage to keep some appearances - especially when THE FAMILY expects me to still bring in cases. I tend to bring in only what I think I can't handle on my own for a variety of reasons. Maybe I don't want the client on my own, and the client doesn't know about my own practice, then maybe for appearances it looks good to THE FAMILY if I refer them a case. Maybe I think I am not as well equipped to handle the matter. (That is a hard one to swallow, and luckily I haven't had to do that yet, but I am prepared nonetheless.) Sometimes, more is better, and HELL at least is more that a solo. (More people, more attorneys - not more in "spirit").
Nevertheless, these are some of the incessant ramblings that go on through my head. I need a break from everything, and have no time to take a break from anything. It is a constant dilemma. I catch up as much as I can on the weekend and evenings. But that is both when I catch up on my solo work and my rest. It seems to be a paradox that I cannot escape.
Pills and booze do work on a temporary basis. I go to therapy. My therapist says that more attorneys and doctors go to (and need) therapy than any other professions/careers. Not surprising, but therapy doesn't fix everything. Neither do hookers.
I would like to know what other people think, but I don't have time to contact people about this. I am busy all the time as I am sure all of you are too. I dread HELL, but I also dread not knowing what will happen next.
Any ideas? If you are reading this you must have some spare time. Please comment or e-mail soon. I need help! Thanks - John Doe, Esq.
Many of you know that I am in the process of opening my own practice. For those of you that are solo practitioners, I am sure you know what I am going through. I feel like I am at the absolute tipping point. I have been working my tail off, especially on nights and weekends. I get new clients where I can, and I do my own work after a full day in HELL. No, THE FAMILY does not know what I am doing. Although, a few of my closest friend in HELL do know. I am keeping it quiet for obvious reasons.
Basically, I need to keep the job while my other cases are pending. I am looking to leave just as soon as possible, but I need the steady income until my own cases pay off. That being said, I cannot stand being there on a daily basis (HELL). It is much more fulfilling to work my own cases, for my own clients, my own way. I also have to manage to keep some appearances - especially when THE FAMILY expects me to still bring in cases. I tend to bring in only what I think I can't handle on my own for a variety of reasons. Maybe I don't want the client on my own, and the client doesn't know about my own practice, then maybe for appearances it looks good to THE FAMILY if I refer them a case. Maybe I think I am not as well equipped to handle the matter. (That is a hard one to swallow, and luckily I haven't had to do that yet, but I am prepared nonetheless.) Sometimes, more is better, and HELL at least is more that a solo. (More people, more attorneys - not more in "spirit").
Nevertheless, these are some of the incessant ramblings that go on through my head. I need a break from everything, and have no time to take a break from anything. It is a constant dilemma. I catch up as much as I can on the weekend and evenings. But that is both when I catch up on my solo work and my rest. It seems to be a paradox that I cannot escape.
Pills and booze do work on a temporary basis. I go to therapy. My therapist says that more attorneys and doctors go to (and need) therapy than any other professions/careers. Not surprising, but therapy doesn't fix everything. Neither do hookers.
I would like to know what other people think, but I don't have time to contact people about this. I am busy all the time as I am sure all of you are too. I dread HELL, but I also dread not knowing what will happen next.
Any ideas? If you are reading this you must have some spare time. Please comment or e-mail soon. I need help! Thanks - John Doe, Esq.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS
Yes, I did intend the pun.
I spent today writing a motion. I spent 8 hours today going through 3 boxes of a closed file in preparation of a motion to support THE FAMILY's legal fee.
Now the question is, "Did I write the best motion possible?"
Multiple choice:
(A) Of course I did. I have a legal and ethical obligation to be a zealous advocate and officer of the court.
(B) I think I did a good job. I worked hard. I put a lot of time into the motion.
(C) Maybe yes, maybe no. I did write a lot, but I found myself drifting off,
listening to the banality that is "secretarial chatter".
(D) Fuck no. They made me sit in a closed office with no windows suffering through this old file because everyone else is away on vacation. I did a crap job and hope that they suffer because of it. Maybe they will get sanctioned. It won't matter to me because I will make sure someone else signs it. In fact, I wrote stuff in the motion to try to get THE FAMILY screwed. It was a pleasure to hurt them, and I'd do it again.
Now, if you chose (A) you're an "Idealist". Idealists do wonderful in law school, but usually have a nervous break down within 6 months of starting to practice law.
If you chose (B) you're the "Average Joe". You do your job. You might not care for it too much, but, hey, your bills are getting paid, and you are just getting the experience you need to move on to another job. Well guess what Average Joe - there are no other jobs out there. This is it, so suck it.
Choice (C) is interesting. If you picked (C) then you're the "Dead End Guy". You are not going anywhere, and you know it. The scary part is that you prefer it to be this way. You don't want any responsibility. You have totally lost that "something" that made you go to law school to begin with. You will never be promoted. You will never be partner. Your significant other is definitely cheating on you. I think I caught you masturbating in the bathroom at work.
Choice (D) is just fucking awesome. You are "The Man" If you picked Choice (D) then you have the balls of a brass monkey. I tell myself all the time that I would pick Choice (D). Sometimes I even do pick choice (D). Whether or not that's in my head or for real, well I'll leave that up to you.
So do you want to know what choice I picked? I picked Choice (insert the ending to the Sopranos here)....
I spent today writing a motion. I spent 8 hours today going through 3 boxes of a closed file in preparation of a motion to support THE FAMILY's legal fee.
Now the question is, "Did I write the best motion possible?"
Multiple choice:
(A) Of course I did. I have a legal and ethical obligation to be a zealous advocate and officer of the court.
(B) I think I did a good job. I worked hard. I put a lot of time into the motion.
(C) Maybe yes, maybe no. I did write a lot, but I found myself drifting off,
listening to the banality that is "secretarial chatter".
(D) Fuck no. They made me sit in a closed office with no windows suffering through this old file because everyone else is away on vacation. I did a crap job and hope that they suffer because of it. Maybe they will get sanctioned. It won't matter to me because I will make sure someone else signs it. In fact, I wrote stuff in the motion to try to get THE FAMILY screwed. It was a pleasure to hurt them, and I'd do it again.
Now, if you chose (A) you're an "Idealist". Idealists do wonderful in law school, but usually have a nervous break down within 6 months of starting to practice law.
If you chose (B) you're the "Average Joe". You do your job. You might not care for it too much, but, hey, your bills are getting paid, and you are just getting the experience you need to move on to another job. Well guess what Average Joe - there are no other jobs out there. This is it, so suck it.
Choice (C) is interesting. If you picked (C) then you're the "Dead End Guy". You are not going anywhere, and you know it. The scary part is that you prefer it to be this way. You don't want any responsibility. You have totally lost that "something" that made you go to law school to begin with. You will never be promoted. You will never be partner. Your significant other is definitely cheating on you. I think I caught you masturbating in the bathroom at work.
Choice (D) is just fucking awesome. You are "The Man" If you picked Choice (D) then you have the balls of a brass monkey. I tell myself all the time that I would pick Choice (D). Sometimes I even do pick choice (D). Whether or not that's in my head or for real, well I'll leave that up to you.
So do you want to know what choice I picked? I picked Choice (insert the ending to the Sopranos here)....
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